Venturing Out

In my former life (which is how I used to refer to my life prior to being a mom, but now I use for my life before being a teacher mom), I blogged in my free time.  One blog chronicled my growing children, another saved recipes to put on repeat, and on a third I rambled on about the thoughts wandering through my head.  When I returned to teaching four years ago, all of those ground to a halt.  I missed writing periodically, but mostly I was just trying to keep my head about the water.  Juggling teaching and three growing, active, opinionatedchildren took all my creative energy, much less my free time.

I have Jenny Magiera to blame for today.  Well, both Jenny Magiera and a leadership pathway professional development group I am involved with in my school district are to blame if I am going to point fingers.

One of our requirements of our spring micro-credentials is to participate in a virtual book study.  I chose Courageous EdVentures by Jenny Magiera, in part because I read three other books (or authors) and I heard her speak at ISTE last summer.  In her book, Magiera writes about being courageous and intentional in the transformation of classrooms.  She walks through several different ways teachers can transform their teaching and ends with the challenge for teachers to share their experiences with others.

"I can't do that," I thought.  "What do I know?  I am not an expert teacher.  I am not doing things that are that different than other amazing teachers at our school.  Who would want to learn from me."

All of those thoughts rushed through my head as I read the chapter on sharing our experiences.  It seems like the aspect of my teaching that I needed the most courage in was sharing what I was doing-both the failures and the small successes.

A month later, here I sit at a computer, wondering what I am doing.  I am still unsure what I have to contribute and say.  This morning though, as I made pancakes before leaving for a cold, cold soccer game, I found myself composing a blog post-reflections on what it really means to teach dyslexic students.  So here I am.  Writing my first blog post, wondering if anyone will read it and what in the world I am doing.

Note to the world-I ask a lot of questions as a source of reflection.  I am not looking for reassurance or pats on the back.  I am simply thinking through my practice and struggling through what transforming my teaching looks like.  I don't speak like an expert, not because I lack confidence, but because I recognize I am continuing to learn.  I like research based instruction and struggle with new trends that sound good versus that which has been proven to work.  In reality, in the classroom I am confident and persistent (which is teacher talk for stubborn).  I question everything instead of accepting new trends blindly.  This is who I am.  This blog is a place for me to reflect on what I've learned, to ask questions about how I can do better, and hopefully be challenged to continue to grow as a teacher.